Dream Big, Live Now: Living Beyond Achievement
"Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced." ~ Søren Kierkegaard
There's something delightfully ambitious about us perfectionists, particularly those of us with an overachieving streak. We dream big - really big. Recently, while contemplating my plans to return to university next year, I caught myself daydreaming about potentially becoming the head of a UN agency someday. And you know what? I love that about us.
This reminds me of Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield's story in his book "An Astronaut's Guide to Life on Earth." As a child watching the Apollo landings, he dreamed of becoming an astronaut when Canada didn't even have a space program. It was, by all accounts, a preposterous ambition. Yet, what's remarkable about his story is how he balanced this seemingly impossible dream with making practical decisions that served him well in the present moment.
The Shadow Side of Perfectionism
This balance is exactly what I want to explore today. Because while I'm all for having big, badass, hairy goals, there's a shadow side to this ambitious nature that we need to address.
The danger lies in using these lofty ambitions as our sole definition of success. When we do this, we inevitably set ourselves up for a persistent sense of failure. After all, if success is defined only by reaching that ultimate goal, then every moment before achieving it becomes coloured by a sense of "not there yet" or "not good enough."
Life Is Not a Race to the Finish
Life isn't a video game where winning means completing all levels as quickly as possible.
The only guaranteed destination in life is death, and it seems tragically wasteful to spend our entire journey focusing on where we're not, only to reach the end and realise we never truly experienced or enjoyed where we were.
Finding Joy in the Present
Let me share a personal example. My decision to return to university next year isn't solely about career advancement or future opportunities (though those are certainly part of it). I'm genuinely excited about spending a year immersed in learning, being in London near my family, and experiencing the pure joy of education. Even if I end up broke and temporarily unemployable afterward (which I hope isn't the case!), there's a part of me that doesn't care because the experience itself holds so much value.
When we truly internalise that tomorrow isn't guaranteed, it becomes clearer that we should do things because they light us up, because they bring us joy—not just because they move us closer to some future achievement.
Breaking Free from "I'll Be Happy When..."
I'm learning to turn away from the constant future-oriented thinking of "I'll be happy when..." because that day never really arrives. By the time we reach one goal, we're already focused on the next, perpetually living in an imagined future where fulfilment always seems to be just around the corner.
Instead, I'm choosing to find fulfilment in the present moment, to bring more joy to everyday activities. It's about appreciating life as it unfolds rather than constantly pushing toward the next milestone.
This isn't revolutionary wisdom. I'm echoing ancient philosophies and timeless truths. But as I embrace this way of being, moving away from pure overachievement toward present-moment appreciation, I'm discovering that true satisfaction comes from enjoying the journey itself, not just the destination.
Over to You
How does perfectionism show up in your life? Are you constantly pushing toward the next achievement, or have you found ways to enjoy the journey? I'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.
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