Saying No to Obligation and Yes to Self-Care

"No is a complete sentence. It does not require an explanation to follow. You can truly say no and move on."
~ Sharon E. Rainey

Picture this: a bright Monday morning, the world still wrapped in a gentle embrace of dawn. I have a group coaching call for my public speaking course, rescheduled to an unearthly 8 A.M. time slot.

Now, let me confess, I'm all about commitments and showing up for them, even when they make me squirm a little. It's a trait I take pride in - the hallmark of discipline.

But here's the twist - sometimes, this pattern of sticking to external commitments can unwittingly overshadow my own internal experiences. As the weeks grew busier, I found myself at a point where I yearned for a break and time to bask in my own rhythm.

Enter the coaching call reschedule. Here's where it gets interesting.

The Turning Point

The morning of that coaching call arrived, and boy, did I struggle. The idea of diving straight into an edgy and challenging session, after spending countless hours on Zoom the previous week, didn't sit well with me.

And you know what? I listened to that little voice inside me that said, "Not today."

So, instead of tuning in to the call, I embarked on a very different morning. I took a walk through the lush rice fields, soaking up the sun and the lush greenery around me. I savoured a leisurely breakfast at a cosy café, laptop in tow. As I basked in the serenity, I realised something profound - I was achieving more in that half-hour of peaceful solitude than I had in weeks of pushing myself.

But here's the real kicker - beyond productivity, what truly struck me was the incredible sense of relaxation that washed over me. It was as if my body exhaled a sigh of relief, acknowledging that I had made the right choice. I won't lie; those familiar stories tried to creep in, stories that label skipping the call as 'irresponsible' or 'lazy.' Yet, I defied those tales and embraced the tranquillity I craved.

The Beauty of Prioritising You

This experience carried an essential lesson - one that I often forget. It's a lesson that I want to share with you: sometimes, saying no is the ultimate act of self-love.

We're not slackers; we're not shirking responsibilities. We're honouring our body's whispers, acknowledging the need for rest, and creating space for genuine growth.

As I recount this moment, I'm reminded of another instance where I found myself at a similar crossroads. A friend asked for my support at an event, and though flattered, I recognised my need for a break. The internal debate was palpable - guilt, pressure, tension. But guess what? The moment I said no, it was like a weight lifted. Suddenly, clarity dawned, and I knew I was doing right by myself.

Embrace the Power of No

So, here's the message I want to shout from the rooftops: It's okay to say no. It's okay to listen to your body's whispers and honour its yearnings. If you're anything like me - driven, committed, and dedicated - remember that embracing self-care isn't a betrayal of those qualities. It's a celebration of them.

As you stand at the crossroads of a decision, to say yes or no, consider this your permission slip. Take a moment to breathe, to feel into your inner landscape, and listen to what your body is saying. Trust me; it's a gift you won't regret giving yourself.

I'd love to hear your thoughts. Have you had a similar experience of saying no and relishing the sweet taste of self-care? Or perhaps you're standing at the threshold of a decision, unsure of which path to take. Share your stories and insights in the comments below.